Overheard in the Lunchroom

The other day I was sitting in the lunchroom talking with my friend M when I overheard a conversation two of my co-workers were having and I thought it would be fun to share it here.

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"I'm so damned tired of this election bullshit already."

"I know, right. It's like every time we turn around one of those dumbasses is on TV trying to out crazy the other guys."

"True facts."

"So do you think that Trump would play a Barbarian?"

"Totally. That guys all, 'Rargh, Mu-slims ain't rights!'"

"Truth!"

"What about Obama?"

"Bard."

"Really?"

"Oh, yeah. He talks a good game; most people love him but nothing meaningful ever gets done by him."

"What about Hillary?"

"God she'd totally be a fighter running about in a pantsuit just hoping that everyone else would listen to her for once and do what she says."

"But they never would."

"Not one fucking time."

I love my geeky co-workers. 

Ballot Stuffing Hugos Style [Updated]

One of the complaints that I have seen about the Hugo Awards from those who oppose the slate candidates is that the Sad and Rabid Puppy groups "stuffed the ballot." According to the theory being expressed by these individuals the fact that the slates pushed for their supports to vote a certain way was the very definition of stuffing the ballot. Not only is this a false understanding of the term, it's a willful corruption to serve a purpose - the delegitimization of the slate candidates and their supporters. This was not an accidental event but a concerted effort by many individuals to control the narrative of the event and to further frame it as a situation where the "good guys" were standing up against the "bad guys" (a tactic that was used equally by both sides throughout the controversy). Already we're seeing this term, "stuffing the ballot," being used in the same manner by slate supporters who are now trying to delegitimize the Hugo Awards for this year.

Let me make this explicitly clear for everyone: by this definition for ballot stuffing that being used in connection with the Hugo Awards every political party is guilty of ballot stuffing simply for asking you to vote for their candidates and platforms. What has been done in the Hugo Awards and their nominating process is not ballot stuffing; it's politics. This has been a fundamental misunderstanding throughout the entire process and increasingly annoying as many of the most ardent proponents of this corrupt definition take every opportunity to make grand political pronouncements on the shortcomings of their opponents.

Stop it, all of you. Amy is not a bad guy because she disagrees with you politically any more than is Ja'Micheal a good guy for agreeing with you.

[Edited 8/23/2015 3:54 PM] Okay, changed the name John to Amy in the last sentence of this post because people thought I was defending John C. Wright. That was not my intention as I was just using the name John for an example. 

Never Enough Time, Until There's Too Much

Drinking.

I'm drinking while I write this tonight, though it won't post until the morning, because today was a day for such things. I am wild in my own thoughts wrapped up in the terrible possibilities that come along with my own ill chosen words. "He's such a fucking cunt," was not where I expected the conversation to go and yet there it was. It hung in the air between us like a wet fart in a crowded elevator. Her jaw hung loose as she stared at me and my blood ran cold knowing that with that single line - with that word I so rarely use - that I had just begun a fight that would run all night. Oh and how it has raged. My, God, there have been tears streaming from beautiful blue eyes as she told me where I could expect to find my dick in the morning. 

Riposte.

Our words formed a gulf deeper than the Mariana Trench which we filled with insults, recriminations, and threats of sexual embargoes. Our voices rose up and exploded like thunder as each tried to shout the other down. There are no winners here; we are all lost with pride dividing us. 

Coule

Words are meaningless when she cries. Everything else falls apart as we cuddle next to each other on the couch. Whispered, "I'm sorry," escapes from our lips as we watch the news. Mike Huckabee has announced he's running for President of the United States. We listen to his speech and as the crowd goes wild she cups my chin in her hand and turns me to face her. "I'm sorry," she says, "you're right. He is a fucking cunt."

Have You Got a Story to Tell? Tor's Looking for You if You're the Right Sort of Person. [UPDATED]

On Friday Morning Tor.com announced that they had once again begun taking submissions for novellas. Now when I was growing up all of my favorite authors were seemingly being published by Tor; so when I saw this I was pretty excited. But you know there's something odd about this announcement. 

 At this time, we are particularly seeking science fictional novellas of all varieties. Lee Harris is particularly interested in space opera, time travel thrillers and interesting new approaches to classic science fiction themes, while Carl Engle-Laird is seeking near-future science fiction and technothrillers that trace their lineage from cyberpunk and post-cyberpunk, as well as space operas with the sense of grandeur and mystery that remind readers of the closeness between space opera and fantasy. We will also be happy to accept fantasy and urban fantasy stories, though we will be prioritizing the SF submissions.

In addition, both Lee Harris and Carl Engle-Laird actively request submissions from writers from underrepresented populations. This includes, but is not limited to, writers of any race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, nationality, class and physical or mental ability. We believe that good science fiction and fantasy reflects the incredible diversity and potential of the human species, and hope our catalog will reflect that. (Engle-Laird)

That bold text up there appeared in the original posting that hit the web on Friday. 

I'm sure that putting that out there was specifically aimed as a blow in connection to the Hugo Award controversy that's going on right now but . . . to my eye it reads like they just wrote, "We want anyone except for you cock swinging, lady breeding, crackers."  Which is, like, the weirdest thing I've ever read. I mean we're talking about a company that publishes books and that wants to make money, right? Shouldn't their goal be just the best stories regardless of the author's race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, nationality, class, physical or mental ability? Why should they give a flying fuck if I'm a black, transsexual, woman who's also an atheist or if I'm a white, straight, guy who's also a Muslim? Shouldn't those things be secondary to whether the story is any good?

You might think I'm alone in this reading of that paragraph but I'm not. When this first came up in my Twitter feed this morning I passed it along to a really talented author I know who deserves to get a break and find himself published by a big company. He was excited when he first heard about it and then it all went away as he finally ended up declaring, "There's no way. They want it from underrepresented populations." 

That completely sucks. 

See this is the tangible result of these controversies we keep throwing ourselves into with such wanton disregard for their consequences. Sides dig in, and suddenly their political agendas become more important than just putting out the best product. These last few years have been overly political with people on both sides of the aisle trying to force their agendas on everyone else and it's clearly a pox on all our houses. Just think how many times you've seen someone one write, "You can't work with this person they're toxic," or "Don't dare associate with her. She believes the wrong things."

I've lost count. 

I am so very tired of this nonsense. We are living in the 21st century. We are on the cusp of electromagnetic engines that can let us travel to Mars in weeks. We have computers that can store more books on their hard drives than any 100 people could read in their lifetimes. I can communicate with people across unimaginable distances and see them on my computer screen in real time. We have a space station and laser guns! Why the fuck are we still letting ourselves be sidetracked with this bullshit?

[[EDIT 5/2/2015 5:40 PM EST]] After talking about this issue with +Russ Morrissey and +Matthew B I've come to the conclusion that I over reacted to the bold text. Most likely I was projecting my own insecurities onto their statements since I actually want to be published one day by one of the big book publishers and I want the people I like published too.

Please accept my apologies for my overreaction and for talking to you with my head shoved firmly up my ass. I'm sure it was hard to hear me clearly when I was so muffled. ;)

Works Cited

Engle-Laird, Carl. "Tor.com is Open to Novella Submissions!" Tor.com. 5/1/2015. Web.