Practiced Self-Control

Steam Sales are like alcohol in that it's easy to lose sight of your limitations and to easily spend all your money and be incredibly happy during those first few hours until you realize that you can't pay rent . . . or buy food . . . or own any clothes because you sold them all. The point is that you have to set limitations on yourself or else you spend entirely too much money.

I try to set my limits on such sales at $20. It makes it hard for me to get into trouble financially, but more importantly it forces me to be frugal and get the best deals for my money throughout the week long sale. This year that resulted in a pretty good haul of new games.

Final Fantasy VII

I first picked up this game nearly twenty years ago and have been in love with it ever since. It was the first Japanese Role-Playing Game (JRPG) I had ever had the pleasure of playing and it set the tone for what my expectations of a computer based RPG would be and how the experience of playing one should feel. Without exaggerating I've probably put in close to four hundred hours of play time on this game over the decades and would still be playing my original copy if a certain ex-girlfriend of mine hadn't stole the second disc.

FTL: Faster Than Light

This was a game that I had been looking at for a while before actually pulling the trigger and purchasing it (for like $1.29). The game is deceptively simple but infinitely complex. You're constantly having to shift your focus between what's happening inside your ship to what's going on outside of it and the result is often a cluster-fuck of an explosion. It's immersive, and an absolute soul-sucker of a game as it's easy to disappear inside it for hours at a time. Really worth checking out if you've been contemplating it.

The Detail

I picked this one up because the trailer captured my imagination. I love point and click games because often the most important aspect of the game is the story rather than how many times can I hit my left mouse button before it breaks. I'm not real sure about what the actual game will be like so I'll write more about it once I start playing it.

Hotline Miami

This is one of those games that I've been hearing about for years but have never sat down to actually play. It's supposed to have an amazing soundtrack - and the limited footage I've watched of it has borne this out - and the game play is reputed to be ultra violent. I can get behind both of those things. I'm excited to check it out. Oh, and I got it for $2.99.

Fallout 3

This is one of those games that I always wanted to play but at the time when it came out my computer was nearly eight years old and it was financially beyond my means at the time to upgrade (I was the only one working). When I finally was able to purchase a new computer I was warned off picking it up because of it's instability on Windows 8.1 (which is the version I own). Still, I've always wanted to play it and I've spent hours watching people like +Many A True Nerd explore it. So when it came available for $2.49 I decided to take a chance on it and see if I couldn't get it to work on my computer.

For those of you like me attempting to get this game to run on Windows 7, 8, and 8.1 there's a guide that the community has created to make it functional. The Ultimate Fallout 3 Setup Guide has a lot of great information collected on how to get the thing to run and a pretty active comments section where people are bringing up problems that they've had and how they fixed them. So check it out if you're wanting to play this one.

Fallout 3: New Vegas

One of my best friends loaned me a copy of this game for the PS3 and I've just absolutely fallen in love with it. The game is incredibly deep and requires a lot of thought. Every action you take feels like it has a real weight behind it and there is this sense that at any moment your next decision could be the one that pushes your character over the edge and off into the abyss of being hunted by everyone you meet and have ever hoped to meet.

I would not have bought it without the Steam sale that knocked it down to $2.49 though. Playing it on the PS3 would have been enough for me, but at such a discount picking it up on PC for my very own seemed like a good idea. My PC is quite a bit more robust than my PS3 so I'm really excited to see the differences in how it looks and plays.

Kane and Lynch 2: Dog Days

This is one of those games that I always wanted to play when it first came out. The game just looks fun to me though it may be a cluster fuck. Either way for $2.49 it was worth checking out. I'll have more on it when I play it a bit.

So did you cats pick anything up?

That Princess Was Always Up to No Good.

Last night I was showing my wife Super Mario Bros 2, which she had never played before, when she asked me why all the Shy Guys were guys. This quickly got us onto an idea that she's been kicking around that the Princess in the Mario games was a trifling hussy who enjoyed getting kidnapped.

"It's the attention," she said as she looked at me. "There are some people who will do anything to make sure that everyone is looking at them all the time and that's what she's doing.

"Besides we both know that most of the people helping Koopa out are just women tired of her shit."

So I made this.

Enough is Enough by Charles Akins

It's 8.5" x 11" and it's available on my storefront for $10.45. If you like it you can pick it up by clicking on the link below.

Enough is Enough by That_Akins_Store
View custom art Posters & Prints at online Zazzle

Star Citizen, the World's Largest and Most Boring Game.

Let me begin this with a confession: I love space games. I love the feel of weightlessness that comes along with a really good space simulator and the way that combat can be taken to a whole different level. The trailer promises a game that will deliver an experience that will make the whole industry take notice.

Just looking at that trailer you can tell that this game is going to be beefy and require a lot of your computer just to run. Rumors have been swirling for a while that it could be fifty gigabytes or more when all is said and done. Which is huge, in and of itself, but it was reported yesterday by PC Gamer that the game will actually be closer to 100 gigabytes with updates running nearly 20 gigabytes! So if you're like me and living on a limited bandwidth (because there are no other options than bullshit, satellite internet) then this game is one you won't be playing based on those two factors alone. However there are bigger for this game than just its size and system requirements.

The above video features a little over fifteen minutes of the game's actual play footage and if you made it past the first two minutes than I applaud you. If you watched it to the end as I did then I pity you because this game play is the most boring thing I've watched in years. It's worse than the early Mech games that often consisted of plodding along for thirty minutes trying to find that last enemy unit that was on the other side of the zone while you hoped that your tape wouldn't reach the end of its side. The combat appears sluggish; there is no music; and even the person playing the game appears too bored to do more than suffer through the game. In short, it's terrible.

I realize that the game isn't fully realized yet and that to judge it so early in its life is a bit unfair - but in this case I feel its warranted. According to everything that's been released around this game the core of it is supposed to be the space combat, and that looked boring as hell. From the trailer I had high hopes for it and was actually considering upgrading my graphics card so that I could handle it at its max settings, but the game play killed any such thoughts. 

Unless something dramatically changes before the game's full launch I will not be buying it. What about you?

Excellent Sale on Civilization and L.A. Noire Happening Right Now

One of my longest love affairs when it comes to video games is with the Civilization series. The game lets you control a real world, historical figure who leads their civilization from the dawn of time to the game's end - which can be a long time in coming. The goal of the game is for the player to build up their civilization through cunning, guile, and military might to eventually conquer the world. The other leaders in the game are each trying to do the same thing (with Gandhi hating your face practically from the moment the game starts) and the A.I. is just smart enough to make the game really challenging if you let the other civilizations get built up.

I've been playing these games for the better part of the last fifteen years starting with the incredible Civilization III (which I'm still rocking). I picked up Civilization IV when it was first released but never got a chance to pick up the expansions or Civilization V because the price on them wasn't quite right for my tastes. Right now, though, on Amazon there's a deal that I can hardly pass up. Between now and Tuesday, March 10, 2015 you can pick up Civilization III, IV, and V - complete - for $16.99. I've never gotten any of the expansion content for any of these games, and at that price I don't mind paying for the bit of the games that I already own. If you've never tried out these games you need to pick this set up because it's a real steal!

The other big sale is L.A. Noire complete for $6.00. I've never played Noire before but after watching Many a True Nerd working his way through the game on YouTube I've decided to give it a chance - especially since it's on such a good sale. In the game you play a detective who has to solve cases across Los Angeles. The game is really beautiful and the story has had me really invested in the game throughout Many a True Nerd's play through. 

If you're interested in either of these games now is the time pick them up as they're on some tremendous sales. (Also, if you're on Steam check out the SteamOS sales going on right now as there are a lot of great games popping up right now that are real steals. Oh, and pick up Saints Row IV. It's a ridiculously good game and at $4.99 on Steam you can't ask for a better price).

Tell Me Again About How Important They Are

Last Friday a post hit the League of Legends forums titled, "Open Letter to Parents of League of Legends Players," which I didn't find out about until today's Penny Arcade. In this post Ice Weasel X wants all you parents out there to let these kids finish their matches. Bed time? Let them play. Dinner time? Let them play? They start a match after you've told them to go to bed? Let them play. I understand that for Ice Weasel X that League of Legends is really important. In fact it's so important that he's gone out of his way to try and tell parents how wrong they are for making their children get off a video game - because doing so is teaching them a bad lesson about their responsibilities towards other people. 

Here's the thing: I don't give a fuck about your god damned video game match. My son could be playing football and if I tell him it's time for dinner his rear had best be heading for that seat at the table. I don't care if he's in the middle of a League of Legends match. I don't care if his team is winning or losing. I don't care if he's the best player or the worst. When I tell him it's time to get off the computer the discussion is over. This isn't a negotiation between equals where your words will have an impact on how my child is raised. I'm the parent, you're not.

 

Get over yourself, you self-important child.

Wolfenstein: The New Order, a Discussion with Tracy Barnett

This morning I got into a conversation with +Tracy Barnett on twitter about the difficulty screen from Wolfenstein: The New Order which he felt was problematic. After a brief exchange on twitter I asked if he would mind writing out his position on Google+ since twitter is absolutely the worst place to have a discussion about anything more complex than 140 characters can convey (which you can read here). I'd like to take this opportunity to respond to him and to expand upon some points that he raises.

B.J. Blazkowicz from Wolfenstein: the New Order

"Let's start with the picture of the main character first. Square-jawed, blonde-haired, looks muscular. In short, everything a "real man" is supposed to be. That kind of image implicitly tells you that this is the kind of man you want doing your shooting for you. It denies the possibility that any other kind of man could do that. It's an assumption that you can't choose another image for your protagonist, so this is your man. He's an ideal, both in terms of looks, and of action. His face says "I'm strong and I'm violent."

(As an aside, he also looks really Aryan, which in a Nazi-shooting game is problematic in and of itself. But as that's not what this article is about, we move on.)" - Tracy Barnett

Arnold, B.J. Blazkowicz from Wolfenstein 3D, and B.J. Blazkowicz from Wolfenstein: the New Order

Actually B.J. Blazkowicz, the main character in most Wolfenstein games and in this one in particular, is clearly designed to look like an action movie star (most likely Arnold Schwarzenegger) from the late 1980s - early 1990s. The popularity of the action genre was at its height during this time with movies like Commando (1985), Predator (1987), Terminator (1984), and Terminator II (1991) coming out and dominating the box office, each with Arnold in the main role. So there is little surprise that when Wolfenstien 3D came out in 1992 that the main character in this series of games has a similar look (as did the main character in Doom and the countless clones that would come after) to the biggest action movie star of the time.  

 

Not to pick apart your analysis of the character but I must take issue with the idea that the long established image of B.J. ". . . denies the possibility that any other kind of man could do that." While B.J. is the main character of the game there are soldiers of a variety of body shapes and characteristics throughout the game who not only fight the Nazis and survive, but that save your life on multiple occasions. Yes you do look like the same character who has been the center of the franchise for over twenty years; but that shouldn't be any more a problem than Sonic, Mario, Link, or any other series of games using the same main character in each iteration of the series. 

Let's move on to what really seemed to bother Tracy about the difficulty screen: the names of the difficulty settings. In this version of the game ZeniMax Media chose to pay homage to the breakthrough Wolfenstein 3D, which launched the entire genre of first person shooters along with their cheesy catchphrases and over the top violence. The menu items in this version are nearly identical with Wolfenstein 3D with one additional term, Uber.

As you can see from the grouping of difficulty screens the Wolfenstein 3D had all the same settings except for Uber and contained the same sort of pictures to express the difficulty level of each setting - including the bonnet and pacifier that graces the current Can I Play, Daddy? setting. For Tracy these titles and their accompanying pictures express a larger cultural narrative around what it means to be a Man which he goes on about at some length. However I don't see that being expressed in the titles. Rather it continues on a long tradition in first person shooter games, which Wolfenstein 3D started, where the game is challenging the player's skill on every level from level select where the mind games begin to the actual game where the player's skills are put to the test.

The other thing that we discussed on twitter was the violence associated with this sort of game. For Tracy, and I don't think I'm putting words into his mouth here, that violence as the only way to deal with Nazis is a problem. Now Tracy didn't have the benefit of having played the game or even of having watched a play through of the game to give him a greater understanding of what's happening in the game and why killing Nazis in this context is a good and necessary thing. He didn't realize that the Nazis in this alternative timeline are still portrayed as the sort of people who attempted to exterminate Jews from the planet and that rape and murdered their way across the world. He wasn't aware that the Nazis murder a whole hospital of mentally deficients early in the story. He didn't know that the game builds a relationship between you and a diverse group of characters who the Nazis are constantly trying to kill (and in some cases succeed). But still, they're fucking Nazis.

Nazis are not good people who were defending their homeland from an aggressive force allied against them. They invaded other countries, murdered millions of civilians, performed grotesque human experiments (which are mirrored in the game), and in general behaved in the worst way possible for human beings to act. They are portrayed accurately in the game with people being forced into the party and soldiers gleefully murdering anyone not of the right racial stock. So is killing them the only way to deal with Nazis?

Absolutely.

If you'd like to watch some of the actual game, which is a lot of fun if you're into first person shooters, then click on the video below by +Jesse Cox. Jesse's play through of the game is enjoyable and he has a fantastic personality that keeps you coming back through each of the videos in the series. He's done a lot of great play throughs since he started his channel and I cannot recommend him highly enough as he's a clever player with a quick wit.

The Gaming Deck: Mountain for PC

Mountain is not your typical game and for many it has become a sore spot in the conversation over what constitutes a game. The problem arises around the limited options a player has in interacting with the game. As a player you don't have direct control over the Mountain and your ability to impact what happens in the game is minimal at the best of times and nonexistent the rest.  You can spin the Mountain with your mouse in any direction you choose, but when the momentum of your swing ends the Mountain will always return to a clockwise rotation. Zooming in and out on the Mountain with the roller on the mouse will show you either the wider cosmos or bring you closer to the lonely Mountain - but not too close. And then there are the keys asdfghjkl;'zxcvbn,. which produce musical notes to pass the time when it's foggy or raining. With such a limited range of interactions available to the player Mountain has been called a glorified screen saver by those who do not acknowledge that it is a game. Yet in doing so they miss the point of Mountain.

The Mountain floating endlessly throughout space has moments where these lines of inner thought cross the screen. They're often simple exchanges such as, "I wonder if no one visits because my trees aren't pretty," "Sometimes I feel kind of ugly. I should stop thinking about that kind of stuff," or "I don't know where the wind starts, it just keeps going." These innocuous phrases slowly build on one and another creating a contemplative entity that is deeply troubled by the way that its life is, and the lack of real understanding of what's going on beyond its limited understanding. The longer you play the more cosmic trash that begins to land on your Mountain and occasionally the Mountain will react to the impacts helplessly asking you, "What was that?" 

As a player you can't answer the Mountain when some new impact strikes it nor can you comfort it when it asks for some other voice to let it know everything is going to be okay. Instead you find yourself having to grapple with the very questions that the Mountain asks and soon you find yourself looking out the window contemplating the world looking back at you. And that's the point of the game: to get you to stop filling your world with meaningless distractions and to actually contemplate what's really going on in your life. It's an existential game that hits just the right spot for me as even the moments where it causes me to look closer at the discomforts of life are well worth the dollar price tag. You can pick up Mountain on Steam for $0.99.

Graphics: 5
Gameplay: 2
Enjoyment: 9

Overall Score: 5.4  out of 10

Just When You Thought Everything About Gaming Was Terrible, Along Came the Console Living Room!

On November 1, 2014 the Javascript MESS project released 21 game systems and roughly 900 games to the Internet Archive. The Javascript MESS project describes their mission as: "The JAVASCRIPT MESS project is a porting of the MESS emulator, a program that emulates hundreds of machine types, into the Javascript language. The MESS program can emulate (or begin to emulate) a majority of home computers, and continues to be improved frequently. By porting this program into the standardized and cross-platform Javascript language, it will be possible to turn computer history and experience into the same embeddable object as movies, documents, and audio . . ." (JSMESS Homepage).

Of the 21 game systems that have been emulated I'm familiar with four of them: the Atari 2600, the Atari 7800, the Sega Genesis, and the Sega Game Gear. Naturally I checked them out and even the big boys are here. Titles like Sonic the Hedgehog, Pac Man, Golden Axe, Shadowrun, and more are here and ready for you to play them in your browser. It's a fantastic moment in the gaming hobby when you can find so many classic games - long since out of production and abandoned to time - available to play again. So check out the Console Living Room and discover some new games you've never even heard of, and rediscover some of your favorites from yesterday!

The Console Living Room

Quick Link to the Best Performers