Saturday, July 12, 2014

Sadly, You Piece of Shit, You're Blocked

 
God, this has been a strange day in my feed.

I started out the morning writing about a fun little mash-up that's been banging about my head for weeks (see The Starship Whatsitsname for more) and then followed it up by running into about a dozen people who were gnashing their teeth about their "cause." 

I said, I like killing ogres, orcs, and anything else I come across in role-playing games; not because they represent the other, but because I like killing things to earn experience points. It's a fun mechanic that let's me jump off buildings, onto a dragon's back, slit it's throat, and ride it's plummeting carcass into an exploding volcano.

"But you could have just as much fun sitting in a room pretending to be molested by your father and discussing your feelings about the imaginary event! Why we've got this game where -"

Let me stop you right there. I'll play spaceship games where I'm blowing up planets. I'll rescue bystanders in a Supers game without a second thought. I'll even raise the dead and start my own necromantic army to fight your Ogres in the Valley of the Three Forks. But if you think for one minute that I'm going to play a game like that then you've completely misunderstood why I play games. 

I play them to unwind and have fun - often killing imaginary creatures by the thousands - not to learn deep emotional lessons about how I would react if my Dad decided to diddle me. Who the fuck even does that? 

Creepy.

"Oh, sure you'll slaughter imaginary elves but you won't even examine your own emotional . . ."

Nope. Not why I play games.

Wait? Why did I get blocked?

21 comments:

  1. I know what you mean, the enemies in my games represent nothing more to me than a chance for my friends and I to get together create a kick ass story, drink some beer, and have some laughs.

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  2. Someone actually argued for playing that kind of game? I'm...speechless. And more than a little creeped out. o.o

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    1. Story games, Holmes, story games . . .

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  3. When I'm playing a grim warlord in a fantasy campaign I wouldn't be exploring my own emotional limits. I don't think about the millions who would seemingly die when I play RISK, I don't worry about reducing people to poverty when I play Monopoly, or the fate of the pawns when I play Chess.

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  4. when studying philosophy i was asked if i had imagined killing anyone this week. I had been playing master of orion so i admitted i had killed hundreds of billions, wiped out scores of civilizations doh. I like guns and cars in games but zero interest in games. I dont like pedophilia in any context.

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    1. Was it an ethics class? It seems like I always got asked questions like that in ethics and everyone always reacted badly - no matter what your answer was.

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  5. Fuck that nonsense. That's a job, not a game. I already got that job don't need another. I'd of blocked them.

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  6. Given that the majority of my games are duets with my wife -- and she's an Old World of Darkness veteran -- my games are far more psychological than I would like... But story gamers are crazy. Dudes, life is hard; why would ANYONE want to play a game like that?

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  7. We had an uncomfortable laugh and we were all squicked out when we realized that the little wooden "colonists" pieces in Puerto Rico were brown. "Oh man, that's awful." Then we kept playing.

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  8. I love your blog because you are a magnet for weird shit.

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    1. It doesn't help that I tend to go looking for things in all the wrong places . . .

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  9. Don't get me started.

    I might have been influenced by folks like you ;) but I have the impulse these days when people start their dumbfuck hairsplitting to grab them by the throat and gently point out that IT'S A FUCKING GAME, SPARKY, where "game" assumes some small level of enjoyment and accomplishment, not Night At the Improv, not group session, and especially not Pseudo-Medieval Simulation Environment V1.1.

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  10. Maybe he was a FATAL player who was LFG?

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