Saturday, January 10, 2015

Praying for a George A. Romero Apocalypse

One of my favorite things about playing with a diverse group of players is that you get to see so much about the world in new ways. It's really exciting to hear a player describe their character attempting to pull off a devastating wrestling move they saw on last night's episode of RAW or one of those bone shattering stunts that Tony Ja pulls off with such mind numbing ease. Today, though, we're talking about zombies.

In traditional Dungeons and Dragons style games your average zombie stumbles about like the walking dead from one of George A. Romero's movies. They're essentially mindless, ravenously hungry, and could be killed with the millions of guns existing in rural America - except this is god damned movie so no one has any fucking guns! Anyway, I prefer those slow, lumbering zombies because if you run it right nothing is more terrifying than cornering your players in the middle of the night when the cleric was eaten an hour ago and no one is doing any real damage.

Best. fun. ever.

Now there are alternative forms of undead that you can suffer with if you like them fast or intelligent; but by and far the worst form I've ever seen are the ones who know parkour. Yeah, you fucking heard me. Just imagine the Walking Dead zombies bounding over fences, walls, and roofs like some jacked up spider-man trying to eat your stupid face.

That video was actually inspired by a new game, Dying Light. Which is going to be a damned resource hog for you PC gamers out there. Here's the recommended specs if you're interested:

OS: Windows® 7 64-bit / Windows® 8 64-bit / Windows® 8.1 64-bit
Processor: Intel® Core™ i5-4670K @3.4 GHz / AMD FX-8350 @4.0 GHz
Memory: 8 GB RAM DDR3
Hard Drive: 40 GB available space
Graphics: NVIDIA® GeForce® GTX 780 / AMD Radeon™ R9 290 (2GB VRAM)
Direct X: Version 11
Sound: DirectX® compatible

Yeah, I can't run that bullshit. I've got an AMD A8-6500 APU with Radeon HD Graphics at 3.50 GHz and 14 GB ram (13.2 usable) so I'm way under on the processor side and graphics side of things. And am I going to upgrade for this game? Well, let's look at the official trailer.

Of course I'm not going upgrade. It's another Resident Evil clone only instead of splashing a nonsensical story line over it like The Evil Within we've got parkour. Hooray. 

Ah well, at least the parkour zombies in the fan video are something new that I can use to scare the shit out of my players.

1 comment:

  1. If the zombie apocalypse has parkour zombies I'm totally screwed unless they are real squishy.


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