|Painting by William Hatherill|
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Not a False Word from These Lips.
"You're bleeding again," she says as she starts cleaning my shoulder with a wet towel. "What happened to you?"
A little laugh, then, "There are no vampire bats here. What happened?"
I was walking along the path down by the lake and listening to the rednecks down by the docks have sex when I saw a woman in front of me. She was unlike anything I had ever seen before. Tall, slender, and with the sort of blonde hair that only comes from Hollywood and doesn't exist in nature. She's wearing this white, silky thing that makes her look like a ghost in the moon light.
"Really," she said with a note of danger entering into her tone.
Really, I say solemnly.
There she was in front of me walking along the path and this great wind comes from ahead of us and blows her robe off. Do you know what she was wearing?
Nothing more than god gave her at birth. I was shocked.
"You were, huh?"
Absolutely. Now she turns about and sees me with her robe and starts smiling at me. She holds her hand out towards me and starts bekoning me towards her. So I walk over and start fumbling over my words. 'Ma'am,' I say, 'you seem to have dropped something.'
Can you believe that? Me! At a loss for words because some blonde filly stands naked in front of me!
"Get to the point," she says with just a tinge more anger than she means to let out.
Right. So she looks at me and starts talking in this strange language that sounds like music and starts trying to take off my pants!
"What?" she practically shouts.
And I say, 'Hold it now! I'm a married man!' and she stops.
"But how did you hurt your shoulder?"
I fell on a rock trying to take my pants off.
Last night I was talking to my wife as we were cooking dinner and she made the comment that in the 11 years we've been together that s...
THE 2014 EDITION OF THE GREAT BLOG ROLL CALL IS UP! PLEASE UPDATE YOUR LINKS SO THAT THE DEAD BLOGS ARE OFF YOUR LISTS! I don...
Last year I started the Best Reads of the Week series to help publicize some of my favorite blogs and to help the community as a wh...
Wizard by Peter Andrew Jones This weekend I was reading a bit more about Wizards of the Coast's latest storyline, The Tomb of Ann...